Kenneth (kensmind) wrote in polloftheday,
Kenneth
kensmind
polloftheday

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More Nuckin Futz


Poll #994515 Nuckin Futz Part 3

In Richard III, after losing his ride in battle, the King cries out "a horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse!" What would you take in trade for your kingdom (such as it is)?

A goat
1(1.8%)
A partridge in a pear tree
4(7.0%)
Magic beans
10(17.5%)
A Ford Pinto
7(12.3%)
Three nights of good and kinky luvin' from Rosie O'Donnell
0(0.0%)
Yuniesky Bettancourt's rookie card
1(1.8%)
A stack of old Penthouse
2(3.5%)
The equivalent of the gross national product (GNP) of Latvia
20(35.1%)
The next-born Cruise-Holmes offspring
2(3.5%)
You'd swing a much better deal than that! (Tell us what you'd get.)
10(17.5%)

The theme song from the Beverly Hillbillies tells us that "the next thing you know, old Jed's a millionaire; the kin folks said 'Jed, move away from there!'" What would your kin folks say if you became a millionaire?

If I became? I is one already!
0(0.0%)
Can I have some cash? Lots of it?
21(36.2%)
You got a real purdy mouth! Squeel like a pig!
0(0.0%)
I only need a small loan... a couple hundred grand should do it...
17(29.3%)
And if you invest in this bridge I'm selling, you'll recover your investment tenfold!
1(1.7%)
These are magic beans.
11(19.0%)
I'd like the money for an operation, and removing testicles and replacing them with ovaries aint cheap!
1(1.7%)
But Oral Roberts will do much better things with the money than you will honey.
3(5.2%)
(No, you've got it all wrong, let me tell you what they'd say in a comment)
4(6.9%)

According to Freddy Mercury and Queen, "fat-bottomed girls make the rockin' world go round!" What makes your rockin' world go round?

Fat bottomed boys
4(6.9%)
Putting over-ripe fruit in my underwear and crushing it with a mallet
4(6.9%)
The thought of Anne Coulter, Nancy Grace and Rush Limbaugh getting permanent laryngitis
21(36.2%)
Accordion solos
6(10.3%)
My collection of exotic lint
1(1.7%)
Sock puppet theatre
12(20.7%)
The law of intellectual property
4(6.9%)
The Museum of Liver and Onions in Pocatello, Idaho
1(1.7%)
The home edition board game of Name That Toe Fungus
1(1.7%)
Something much more exciting that I'll tell you about in a comment.
4(6.9%)

Red Green, the proprietor of Possum Lodge, frequently says "if the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy." In a similar vein, your motto is:

If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you with a pulse
2(3.4%)
If at first you don't suck seed, keep on sucking till you do suck seed
2(3.4%)
Here's a little song I wrote, you might want to learn it note for note, don't worry, be happy.
10(17.2%)
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
10(17.2%)
Nobody is perfect. I am nobody, thus I am perfect.
9(15.5%)
You and me baby, we aint nuthin but mammals, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.
7(12.1%)
I've never stolen a dollar in my life! Vote for me, I just want a chance!
0(0.0%)
I was a varsity tackle and a hell of a block, but when I played my guitar I made the canyons rock.
1(1.7%)
Some days you're the pigeon and some days you're the statue.
14(24.1%)
(My motto is much better than any of these. I'll tell it in a comment).
3(5.2%)
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